Dark Raven
by neeme88
Summary: The is war coming, and Hermione will play a big part in it, but all she wants is peace. Too bad a new found power, an apprenticeship, two new classes, and new friends will make that impossible for her. Will she find her place in the world or let insanity take hold of her?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hope you like…:D**

**Disclaimer- I don't own Harry Potter :c **

Hermione. Hermione Granger. That's my name, and my burden. Sometimes I pretend I don't have magic. I pretend I'm a normal muggle. Being normal would make my parents proud and happy. On other days, though, I pretend I'm not an ounce of muggle, that magic has always been what I am and who I am. Being a pureblood would make the wizarding world less harsh on me, and it would keep them proud and happy. On the days I'm not pretending, I see nothing for me. Nobody is happy with anything I do, and I find myself wondering "what if?' What if I could be another person? What if I could not care about anybody's thoughts? What if the world was kinder? What if..?

In the end I drown myself in despair and sorrow at everything I'm not.

"Can you believe this, Hermione…? Hermione?"

I turned to Harry, an apologetic look on my face. "What was that Harry? I zoned out for a bit."

"I said, can you believe the schedule for this year? Ron's going to flip. We have almost all our classes with the Slytherins, and Snape! We also have two new classes, but it doesn't say what they are. Do you know Hermione?"

I looked over the schedule in interest. The biggest changes we had were double potions, two new unknown classes and only one class without Slytherins. I sighed. Why? Why did this dramatic change have to be this year? I was more concerned with this year, than any other. If I let my grades slip even in the slightest I was done. Mom and dad would give up on me. I would become their biggest mistake and disappointment.

My breath became shallow and my vision became blurry. My heart beats were strong and loud, blocking out the noise of the great hall. My blood rushed fast through out my body. 'Please let me fall asleep and never wake up. I don't want to be here anymore,' I pleaded to whatever was making me feel sick.

A hand rested on my shoulder and I drowsily looked over. Harry's face was calm and collected, but his eyes shined with worry and panic.

"I'm fine, Harry. I was diving in a lake near my house yesterday. I must be catching a cold," I told him. He seemed to believe me, but he put a cup of warm, cinnamon pumpkin juice in front of me.

"Mrs. Weasley said that it helps lessen the symptoms, so drink up, mate," he recited all while giving me a charming grin. I chuckled. That was the same grin he used to make people do things for him.

"You know Harry one day you're going to find someone that can resist your charming smiles, and then you'll be in some real dip shit," I joked as I lifted the cup to my lips and drank. The taste was sweet and nostalgic. It tasted like frosted gingerbread cookies on a Christmas day.

Harry fake gasped, "Did 'the' Hermione Granger just curse? I can't believe my ears! And by the way it hasn't happened yet princess. I do agree, though, when it does…well that will be the day all hell freezes over."

I laughed and suddenly I wasn't feeling helpless anymore. I felt at home.

"Thank you, Harry," I said tenderly to him. His gaze softened, and he nodded. Harry was the only person that knew there was something wrong at home and in my mind. He knew I wasn't thanking him for a silly drink, but rather for his gift of making me feel like a regular person that could laugh and have fun. He and Ron were the only two people that could make that happen, and sometime Ginny, too.

"Where are Ginny and Ron, by the way? I see the twins, though." I asked Harry. As I looked at the twins, though, I realized they had a slight solemn look on their faces. Something was wrong. I turned back to Harry and saw that he had noticed, too.

"Harry, something happened. Didn't it?"

"I don't know, Hermione. I tried talking to them this morning on the train, but they wouldn't spill. I've even asked around, but nobody knows. My only option now is to go to Dumbledore," he said gingerly. He was afraid, but then again so was I. What kind of news would we get?

Harry and I both went back to making small talk with everybody and catching up on how our summers had been. As everyone talked about adventure, new experiences, and the latest gossip I felt that feeling of longing and jealousy creep into me, again. Lying to them about my summer and how excited I was to be back was the easy part. The hard part was listening to them. Knowing that their happiness and worries, as silly as they maybe, will never be yours.

"Quiet down students," Dumbledore said as he stood in front of the eagle podium. Everyone, thankfully, stopped chattering, and gave him their utmost attention. "As you have all noticed, there have been drastic changes made to this year's schedules. Each house will have more classes with their rival house Slytherin with Gryffindor and Hufflepuff with Ravenclaw. Last year, it came to my attention that house rivalries have gotten out of control. The teachers and I have tried everything to end it, but still it rages on in furry. So I've decided that maybe if we let it all play out it will end better than how it did last year. This year will be the one that maters the most. The house cup will go to the house that has the most points as usual, but there is a twist. Because you are paired up with your rival house, in all classes, you will be competing against them, and only them, the entire year. At the end of the year, there will be a final duel between the rival houses. Five of the best students from each house, and any year, will be picked to duel. Whoever is victorious will go to the final round to battle the other victor from the other houses."

He paused to our minds register all that he said. When people started to whisper in amazement and excitement he continued, "It has also been called to my attention that most of your parents miss you, and would like to be informed of your well being, and grades. So I have put in twenty open house days; all will be at the end of each month. Your parents have been notified of this and will all be coming in for the first day of open house."

Everyone clapped and cheered with the exception of Harry and I. instead of happiness I felt raw and sick. I felt like it was an invasion of privacy. I suddenly didn't feel well again. It wasn't until Harry's hand found mine that I realized I had to pull it together. I looked up at Harry and saw him to have a look of dread on his face. No one would be there for him. His parents were dead, and the Dursely's would rather visit hell than come see the freaks as they so kindly put it everyday. I squeezed his hand in understanding before we both looked back at Dumbledore.

"On a more serious matter, a family was attacked two days before their children were to return to Hogwarts." a chill passed through me, and I was sure my face was ten times paler. Somehow I knew he was talking about the Weasleys. "This was confirmed to be the work of death eaters. The reason I am telling everyone of this news is to warn you. I will not lie about the dangers that are to come. I will not tell you to be calm and collected because nothing will happen because that is a lie, my students. There is darkness in the horizon and I am telling everyone to be ready. Arm yourselves with knowledge and courage, for that will be your greatest weapon. Now in light of this news, I wish to talk about the two extra classes everyone is wondering about. These classes will either be teachings in combat with magic both dark and light, healing and divination, technology dealing with both muggle and wizarding inventions, and survival. The hat will sort you into your classes. The sorting will begin tonight and end in two days. Everyone is dismissed. You may go back to your dorms and settle in. I expect to see all seventh years here in one hour."

The food disappeared and the great hall came to life with the chatter of people talking and leaving. Harry turned to me and the look in his eyes told me we both had the same idea. I pulled his arm and left with the students, but not to our dorms. Unlike the rest of our oblivious friends we were worried for the Weasleys.

The gargoyle that led up to Dumbledore's office reminded me that we didn't have its password. Harry seemed to be having the same trouble.

"I guess we name every candy out there then," I suggested.

"Lemmon drops, ice cream, licorice ice," Harry blurted out rapidly.

"Strawberry truffles," a deep voice said behind us. Both Harry and I pull out or wands and turned swiftly to the person. Professor Snape lifted an eyebrow at our defensive positions. I quickly dropped my wand and put it back in my ankle pocket. Harry still had his wand out, though. I elbowed him in the ribs, to which he grunted in response.

"Stop being thick you idiot," I growled out at him. There were after all more important matters at hand. With that I swiftly turned around and went up the stairs. By the noise behind me Snape and Harry were both following me. I knocked on the office door before entering.

"Harry, Ms. Granger; I was expecting you both," he said to us in a reluctant voice.

I couldn't form the right question. Hell, I didn't even know what to ask.

"Professor what happened?" Harry blurted.

"Evil, my boy," Dumbledore said cryptically. I was getting tired of that. I wanted answers and by the look on Harry's face, so did he.

"Stop with the riddles and obvious shit, and tell us in detail what the hell happened? Is Ronald alive? What about Ginny? This isn't the time to be giving us vague fucking answers. These are our friend's wellbeing and lives we are talking about! So answer us damn it! Tell us!" I uttered in anger.

Harry was surprised at my out burst. Sure I cursed in front of him, but I had never been this outspoken to anyone, especially Dumbledore.

Snape even looked shocked, and very little seemed to surprise him, but I had managed to do the impossible.

"I'm sorry Ms. Granger, but there is no easy way to say this," Dumbledore apologetically explained.

"Two days ago, death eaters set fire to the Weasley's estate. It was in the middle of the night, and no one was able to stop them. Ginny Weasley suffered from smoke inhalation, burns, and head trauma as debris fell on her. The twins managed to get her out in time. The story does not end there unfortunately. The death eaters waited for them to come out, and once they did, all suffer from the cruciatus curse and other deathly spells. Arthur and Percy Weasley both died in the attack, Mrs. Weasley was raped and is now on suicide watch, and Ron Weasley is in a comma. The twins are on pain medication and anti-depressants. I am deeply sorry we could not stop this incident."

The way Dumbledore said all of this made me question his last statement. His eyes were defeated and apologetic.

"It's not as if you knew it was going to happen, professor," I said in an accusing manner. Dumbledore looked into my eyes. That was the moment I was sure of my suspicions.

"But you did didn't you," I stated. Harry looked over at me in shock and disbelief.

"Hermione, what are…?" Harry began to say.

"No, Harry, look into his eyes. Tell me that, that look is one of sorrow and loss, and not one of pure and utter guilt," I yelled. He looked at me hard before his gaze became a glare, but not directed at me. He knew I was right.

"Ms. Granger, you are right. We knew there was going to be an attack, but we didn't know when. Only three people knew of the attack's date and time. We set wards up, too powerful to be breached. We thought they would be alerted by the wards and have time to escape. Something went terribly wrong," Snape said. For the first time in all my six years at Hogwarts I saw a tired and almost defeated Snape.

"No, don't blame yourselves. I'm being too close minded. You tried to protect them. You warned them, but still… Shit happens, I know. I'm sorry I raised my voice and troubled you. Harry and I love the Weasleys. They are the family we never had, and the thought of them being tortured and put through this kind of hell makes me sick with raw anger. It feels like someone froze my body but made my insides blaze with fire," I breathed out in helplessness.

Harry pulled me to his side and put his arm securely on my waist. He knew I was beginning to feel sick again.

"Professors, will they make it, in your opinion?" Harry asked.

"The chances that Ginny and Ron will survive are enough, but the chances for their want to live are grim," Dumbledore said in an aged tone.

I coached my face into a look of indifference and straightened my back. I felt Harry do the opposite. He was defeated, too.

"Don't you bloody dare," I told him. He gazed up at me with the saddest eyes he'd ever worn.

"I know you love Ginny; I mean really love her. Ron is the closest thing we've had to a blood brother and all, but you can't give up. You don't get to give up. It's your destiny to fight, and be the bloody savior of this half of the world, you now things like this are going to happen. Sometimes they win the battle, but that doesn't mean they win the war. Please don't give up; it's going to be up to you to bring them back from that dark abyss they were thrown into. You have to save Ron, our idiotic friend and our best mate, and Ginny, our strong innocent lioness. So don't you fucking dare Harry James Potter," I finished.

"Thanks," he breathed out. A while later, he gave me his signature grin. I playfully elbowed him in the ribs.

"Now, I really must get going. All this heart to heart makes me tired. Harry, finish up here. I'll see you tomorrow," I said to them.

I gave both Dumbledore and Snape a parting nod before leaving down the stairs. When I reached the last step I let lose what I didn't want Snape or Dumbledore to see. Silent tears streamed down my face as I walked aimlessly through the castle. It wasn't fair what happened to the Weasleys. They were a decent family! They loved each other and now that family was broken. Why?

Shuffling sounds were heard behind me and I remembered that seventh years were to be in the great hall. I felt panic for a second. I didn't want anyone to see me like this. Looking around I saw I was close to the astronomy tower. I let out a sigh of relief. I quickened my pace and soon the noise was distant, and I was once again left to my thoughts. The stairs that led up to the tower seemed endless. It reminded me of the stairs in what use to be the Weasley house. I remember the first time I stepped foot in that blasted house. My first thought had been, 'Mom would never approve of me being here.' Everything seemed to be old, and a bit dirty. To me the house was extremely different than what I was accustomed to. There were no maids there, and everyone had to make due with the space they were given. As more summer days passed, and I stayed there more, I realized everything in the house had memories the family cherished. The old couch had been through three generations of Weasleys, and the ratty old rug had been the rug Arthur and Molly had fought about constantly until it grew on her and she decided against burning it. A dent in one of the wall was made when the twins had decided to pull their first authentic prank. The things I took for granted because of their age were special to them and I learned then to appreciate the things around me.

As I steeped on the last step to get to the top I felt the feeling of helplessness creep into me. I wish I could have changed what happened to them. I wish it would have never happened to begin with.

I let a small sob escape me as I stood in front of one of the railings. I grabbed on to it and gripped it hard. Why did the good things never last? Did I do something in another life for karma to hate me so much?

"Granger," I heard someone call out. I turned around to look at the intruder. My wand rested nicely in my hand as I came upon the face of Draco Malfoy.

He was in the dark corner of the room. He didn't have a sneer on his face, but he didn't look pleased with my presence. I didn't know what to say and I also didn't trust my voice to talk, so I stood, waiting.

"Leave," he bit out coldly. I frowned, but what could I say without breaking down in front of him? I gave him a hard glare before I moved to the stairs. As I was about to reach the stairs, a 'caw' sound caught my attention. I looked over to the rail were I had been just a few seconds ago. A raven was perched there ominously. It cawed again, and I found myself drawn to it. As I looked over it I saw it had silver luminescent eyes. My brow furrowed at this.

I had seen this bird before. For seven months I had dreamt of it, and for one week prior to the start of the school year, it had followed me.

"Is that you?" I whispered.

"Granger, stop talking to birds like a fucking loony and get the hell out," I heard Malfoy ground out.

He was forgotten, though, as the bird spread its wings at me, and I felt myself move towards it. My hand lifted to touch its head, but as I did, it pecked me. I felt flesh tear, and blood begin to seep out, but I did not waver in my actions. The raven jumped into my hand, and I felt power. Not the power that had always been taught to control, though, a different type of power a more sinister and dark type that could rival Voldemort's. I gasped and the raven flew out into the night sky. The power disappeared, and I didn't like that.

"No, wait," I called out. I moved forward, but suddenly I was forced to the ground. The impact was harsh and I was sure a bruise was starting to for on my arm. I looked up in anger. Draco Malfoy stood there. The moon reflecting his hair to look similar to that of an angel, but his dark robes made him look more of a fallen one instead.

"What the hell?" I exclaimed.

"You were about to jump, you stupid fucking idiot! Be thankful I didn't want to be blamed for your suicide," he sneered.

I stared wide eyed at him. Jump? I was going to jump?

"I wasn't…," I began, but couldn't finish. I didn't know what I was going to do. I was just too transfixed.

Malfoy gave me a mean incredulous look before turning to leave.

"Wait, please don't go!" I called after him. 'I don't wan to be alone,' I wanted to say. He turned, and raised an eye brow at me.

"I…I…never mind," I corrected. He kept staring at me, though.

"What?" I asked gingerly.

"You need to leave, too. I would hate valuable space on the newspapers to be filled up with the death of one of the golden trio. There are more important issues at hand, I would imagine," he said.

I gave him a nasty look before walking down the endless stairs. He followed behind.

"I wasn't going to jump," I told him, as a side note.

"Right you weren't, you were just going over the railing in an attempt to kiss the ground below. Nice Granger really nice thinking," he deadpanned.

When we made it to the bottom of the stairs someone was waiting for us.

"Ms. Granger, Draco, It's past curfew," Snape sneered.

"I'm sorry, sir we lost track of time," I explained.

"Either way, both of you will serve detention in the dungeons tomorrow. I will have to notify your parents and Dumbledore," Snape said.

My eyes widened a bit. He couldn't tell them. They would be disappointed. "No please. I beg you; don't tell my parents they're busy. I don't want to disturb them. I'll do double work for you, or help clean your cauldrons, even organize your ingredients," I pleaded.

"Calm down, mudblood. It's not the end of the world if mommy and daddy find out that their innocent little girl is sneaking around the castle with the school's devil," Malfoy mocked.

"Shut up, you git. I was not sneaking around with you. Hell I don't even like you," I gritted out.

"At least other people like me. What can you say for yourself? You barely have any friends, except for boy wonder and the weasels. And you want to know why? You're always acting like a know-it-all; your nose is always stuck in a bloody book, your care more about school, etc. Granger you have no life," Malfoy concluded.

My mouth became dry, and I found I could not defend myself. He was right. I had no life. I'm pathetic. Of course I had reasons to act the way I did and do the things I did, but my reasons where also pathetic.

"That's enough, Draco. You have double detention, and as for you Ms. Granger, we have a deal. You will clean out the cauldrons and organize my ingredients cabinets. In exchange I will not have to notify your parents of something such as this," Snape intervened.

I nodded numbly and began to walk away to the Gryffindor tower. The voices of Snape and Malfoy became distant, and the sound of my footsteps was all I could concentrate on. The walk through the cold stone halls felt hollow, or maybe that was what I was. The torches that lit up the halls began to become dimmer and I knew that it was almost past midnight. I hurried my steps and ran up the moving stairs until I managed to find the fat lady.

"Child what are you doing up so late?" she chided.

"I wasn't tired," I responded lightly.

"I suppose it happens. I too have sleepless nights. Password?"

Suddenly I remembered I never received the password. I sighed in defeat.

"I don't know it. I wasn't here to get it," I thought out loud.

"Heavens, such bad luck. I can't let you in then. I'm sorry," she spoke softly.

"I know," I replied.

I slid down the wall and looked up at her. The fat lady, that was what people called her, but what was her real name? Who was she really? Her eyes were and ageless blue and her hair were put up in a Victorian style. Some brown locks hanged loose, though. They looked soft and curly.

"Fat Lady, what is your true name?" I asked.

Shock filled her eyes. "No one has asked me that in a long time, and honestly I haven't thought of that name in a while… Evangeline Purcell," she replied.

"That's a nice name," I told her. Her eyes softened and she offered a true smile. One that told me it had meant something.

"Who were you, in your time, I mean," I questioned.

Her smile became wider and her eyes were no longer here, but in her past and memories. "I was a singer, mother, daughter, pianist, and lover. In my time I was famous for my voice. I got to see plenty of the world because of it. Italy was my favorite place, though. I met my husband there, you know. He was a handsome man, but he was shy and soft spoken. We traveled together for a whole year before he gained the courage to propose. It was the happiest time of my life. Our love was fresh and sweet, like a strawberry. We had four children! Can you believe that? Four! They were the apple of our eyes, though… my baby boys," she told me.

I smiled, but something plagued my mind. "What happened to them?"

"War, my child. War happened. Our children were in their blooming point when a war was waged in the wizarding world. They were taken from us. All four. They were to fight and defend what they held dear, but they children and they didn't know the terrors of war. They all died in the many battles, and my husband he died of sadness," she finished.

I wanted to cry for her, but I knew she had done enough of it and it wouldn't help ease her pain.

"I'm sorry it happened that way," I said to her.

"I am too, child. I am too," she sighed.

"You know there's going to a war here soon? I'm scared, but not for the reasons everyone else is. I scared for the people I have grown to know and love. I found out today that the family that I grew to love as my own was destroyed. The father and eldest brother died from too many curses. The mother was cursed, raped, and beaten. Her daughter was injured and burned, and her twin brothers don't have the will to live. The youngest boy, my friend, he's in a coma. The funny thing is the war hasn't even begun and already the casualties are beginning to pile up," I murmured.

"I understand your fear, for I too have felt it. The difference is you will get to fight and defend your loved ones on the battle field. You're strong, Hermione Granger, I can feel your magic. It's dark but your heart is strong and loyal. You will be able to do what I never could," she said sadly

"I hope," I whispered to myself. "Why are you here, Evangeline? Why did you decide to stay here?"

She smiled and looked at me with soft eyes, eyes that were filled with love.

"For my family. They're here, too. In the portraits of this castle there are five handsome men with eyes of strong violet. Although life was cruel to us in the end, we will forever spend our after life together. When my presence is not needed here I leave to see them," she responded.

I smiled at that. They were still together. They were happy.

"Why here?" I asked. I love Hogwarts, but there were other places. Places where people didn't roam the halls, and privacy was insured.

"This was the place that made us the happiest. I sang here plenty of times in the olden days. My husband was a potions master here, one of the best I must say, and my children learned here. They loved it here, thought it was the most magical place on earth," she explained.

"Will you sing for me, Evangeline?" I asked tiredly. The stress and events of the day had finally started to catch up with me.

She smiled an elegant and dazzling smile, as she moved to a piano in the background of her portrait. I made myself comfortable against the stone wall, as comfortable as anyone could get, anyway. My legs were stretched out and my hands lay limp to my sides.

_Ahhhh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahhhhhh _

_I'll seek you out, Filet you alive _

_One more word and you won't survive_

_And I'm not scared of your stolen power I see right through you any hour I won't soothe your pain …_

_I won't ease your strain …_

_You'll be waiting in vain …_

_I got nothing for you to gain …I'm taking it slow Feeding my flame _

_Shuffling the cards of your game _

_And just in time In the right place_

_Suddenly I will play my ace I won't soothe your pain…_

_I won't ease your strain …_

_You'll be waiting in vain…_

_I got nothing for you to gain Eyes on fire Your spine is ablaze _

_Felling any foe with my gaze And just in time In the right place _

_Steadily emerging with grace …._

_Ahhhh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahhhhhh Felling any foe with my gaze _

_Ahhhh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahhhhhh _

_Steadily emerging with grace _

_Ahhhh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahhhhhh _

_Felling any foe with my gaze_

_Ahhhh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahh-Ahhhhhh _

_Steadily emerging with grace…._

"Goodnight…."

**Hope you enjoyed review, alert, etc. Tell me what you think. Also the song is "Eyes on Fire" by Blue Foundation =D**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews **INACTIVE Poptart-Freak** (P.S. I like that song, I hope everyone has at least heard it once) and **Megan Consoer** (here's some hope you like!) =)**

A drum beat. My eyes shot open at the foreign noise that had rudely awaken me. I looked around in frenzy, but discovered someone lay at my feet, and she did not look pleased.

"Hello, Lavender," I said sheepishly.

Her face of anger turned to one of annoyance, as she still glared at me. I looked around me nervously, finding the floor to be very interesting.

"Bloody hell, Hermione. What are you doing there? Don't you know someone could trip?" she asked sarcastically.

I offered her an apologetic look before getting off the wall, and helping her to her feet. My neck filled with tension, and my muscles screamed with pain and heat. I winced a bit. The wall had not treated my sleeping body too well.

"Sorry, Lav. I wasn't here to get the password yesterday," I explained to her.

"You slept out here?" Her eyes stared bewildered at me. I nodded.

"Oh! Well the password is Leo-pixie," she said, now recovered from her anger.

I smiled. "Thank you! I'll see you at breakfast, then."

"Sure, thing."

I looked up and saw Evangeline laughing silently. I pouted.

"Not funny_" I whined, "My neck is killing me! The only thing I can look forward to is a nice soothing shower."

"Password?" she giggled.

"Leo-pixie," I said with a deadpanned expression.

The portrait swung open, and I sighed in relief. I bid farewell to Evangeline and thanked her for her company.

The common room was warm and comforting, with colors of red and gold here and there. I remember the first time I came here. I thought the colors reminded me more of blood and honey. They still do, but I have little time to dwell on subjects such as those.

I noticed a few students that were on the couch, or resting on cushions, looking at me strangely. I threw them an annoyed look. They all seemed young, probably first and second years.

"Remember your passwords. You could end up sleeping in the hall," I remarked. Some of them seemed amused, and others confused. I did not stick around long enough to explain, though.

"Hermione, where have you been?" Padma Patil exclaimed.

"I was locked out," I replied.

"You slept outside?" Parvati Patil asked as she dried her damp long thick hair from the shower.

"Yeah. It sucked, thank Merlin I had Evangeline, though. Ugh, I feel like a walking zombie. I'm going to take a shower now, bye," I told them.

They looked confused, but I summoned a towel and continued on to the showers. Behind me, I heard:

"Who's Evangeline?"

"A ghost, maybe?"

"I'm hungry, let's head down now."

Water droplets cascaded on me in light sheets of pure spray. I let my hair cover my face, as I was lost in thought. Today was the first day of classes. I needed my grades to be the highest, and I could not let myself get anything below a 100. 'I need to be the best,' I concluded, as I turned off the water.

I dried my hair and made sure it looked tame, not a single hair out of place. I dressed into my robes. They were neat and not a single crinkle seen. I checked my nails to be sure they were clean and even; they were. I took one last look in the mirror before heading down.

"You can do this," I told myself before leaving.

Breakfast was loud with chatter and gossip. My lock out incident had already spread throughout the table and I received many amused looks. I shrugged at them; shit happens. I searched for Harry, but did not see him. I glanced over to Dumbledore, and saw him giving me a reassuring look. I nodded in understanding. He was probably doing something for Dumbledore.

I ended up sitting beside Neville and Lavender. Neville went on about Herbology, while Lavender went on about the latest look and the latest gossip. I input a few of my thoughts in each conversation, but my heart was not in it. I felt empty, and as much as I tried to listen and fall into their words, I could not. I decided to eat, but my appetite was missing. I grabbed and apple and excused myself. "I'm going to go get some fresh air. I'm feeling a bit hot." They bid me farewell, and I was off.

I, somehow, ended up back in the astronomy tower. I felt at peace here, which was strange. Harry, Ron, and I came up here once in our third year, but I left quickly after a severe attack of vertigo hit me while nearing the railing. It felt different now. It felt more liberating, and calming. The view was beautiful; mountains in the distance, thriving valleys, lush dark forestry. I loved it. It was a refreshing change, rather than my world; where skyscrapers, mansions, and glass buildings, seemed to overwhelm me.

The red apple in my hand felt heavy and cool against the flesh of my palm. The cut that the raven had inflicted on me yesterday was sore in protest, though. I shifted to see the cut better, and found it had been deep, and there was already a scab in place. It would probably leave a slight scar.

'Caw.'

I let the apple go and it rolled somewhere behind me. I looked up in confusion and excitement. The raven was on the rail in front of me. Its silver eyes stared at mine, as if looking into my soul. What was it looking for?

"What do you want from me, raven?" I questioned. As soon as the words left my lips, I felt foolish. I was talking to a bird, who would never understand me. It was just an animal.

The raven leapt up to my hand. I was startled at its actions, but I did not shoo it off. It bowed its head to my cut and looked back at me. I was at a loss. It was actually showing me something, but I did not understand.

"I don't understand," I told it.

The raven looked back into my eyes, as if to say, 'I know.'

My brows furrowed. The emotion that I was noticing was not my own, but the bird's. In that instant, I knew it wanted me to trust it, to give into whatever I had been holding back from the whole summer, and the time Harry had been talking to me. The sick feeling, I had tried to fight, came back to me and I did not hold back. I let it take me, body and soul. My heart beat loudly, and it was the only sound I could hear. My breaths became shallow, until I was almost sure I was not breathing anymore. At that moment, I felt the power from yesterday comeback in a blast within my heart that knocked the wind out of me and pushed me to the ground.

When I was young, my parents took me to Australia. One day, we went to one of its many beaches. They told me not to go too far, but, being a child, I snuck out to the shoreline, while they set up our area. The ocean was so beautiful. I felt small compared to it, and it amazed me. At first, I was content with having the water caress my feet, until later. I wanted more, so I stepped out. The water was just above my waist when an ocean tide came in too strong and pulled me in to its clutches, away from the sandy hot shore.

I tried calling out for help once, but I doubt anyone heard me. I fought to stay a float until I found it tiring to do so. Instead, I remember being still. The clear salt water burned my throat, and my heart felt like it was beating out of my chest. Yet, there was a few second, before I lost all oxygen, which felt magical. The way the water strongly twisted around my body, while I moved back and forth through its tides, looked beautiful. It was almost as if the ocean was dancing around me, and its voice, the strong roaring whooshing, was the last thing I heard before I closed my eyes.

Two lifeguards, that had seen me get too close and swept away by the tides, rescued me. My parents had noticed my absence until they heard all the commotion made by my rescue. That was the last time we ever went to the beach together, and the first day they began to look for a swimming coach. Now swimming is second nature to me, but I had never again felt that feeling of magic I experienced while almost dying, until now.

The feeling did not panic me, though. It was familiar and nostalgic. The power soon transformed to something dark and frightening. It caressed every inch of my flesh, just as the ocean had. It seduced me and I fell for it. This time no one was here to save me, no one could, and I was fine with that. I did not want this feeling to go away. I wanted it to be with me forever. This was the most alive I had felt in years. Finally, everything started to settle, not leave. My breath finally came back to me. I took big greedy breaths of air, savoring the feeling of oxygen running through my lungs. As I began to breathe, my heartbeats became normal, and I was coming to my senses. I felt various presences in the tower, and slight pressure on my shoulder. I looked over to my shoulder to see what was on it and came face to face with the raven. He stood proudly on my shoulder. I felt him urge me to look up. What I saw shocked me, and at the same time put me in awe. Ravens, more than I could count, were perched up wherever they could fit. These ravens unlike the one on my shoulder had bloody red eyes and a few had honey eyes. They all stared down at me, observing my every move and taking in my appearance. They stood silently and still as stone, in fact someone could mistake them as statues. Finally, I noticed that they were not the only beings in the room. I look toward the staircase and found McGonagall, Dumbledore, Snape, Harry, and Malfoy standing there. They all looked to be frightened, and shocked. Dumbledore and Snape were the only ones that seemed to have their facial expressions under control, but also a grim aura settled around them.

Suddenly, I found myself question what had just happened to me. I tried to think of what this could be, but I found myself panicking. I suddenly remembered that the magic I felt coursing through out my body was dark, everything Hogwarts had taught us to fear. I stood up abruptly, the raven still hung on to me, though, and no one seemed to move either. Were they just as confused as I was?

The ravens above dove into the air around us, as if they too were in a panic. They swarmed around us, cawing as they did so. I heard McGonagall give out a loud yell, as she tried to keep the ravens away from her. Harry tried to help her but the birds began to peck and pushed them to and fro. Soon, the noise of strong wings flapping, shrill cries of the birds, and the commotion made by the McGonagall and Harry overwhelmed me.

"Stop!" I shouted. I shocked myself at the tone of my voice. It was commanding and superior.

The birds all stopped panicking and fell into an ordered, organized group that flew above us. Then, they soon vaporized into a thick, dark, wispy fog. The fog floated lightly over to me, like a snake catch up on its prey.

Soon the fog soaked into my body, past my skin, and into my soul. I gasped at the feeling. It felt as if I had walked naked through a blizzard. Yet right after the feeling of cold passed, my magic felt at its prime.

The raven on my shoulder gave a shrill caw, a promise to be back, and flew out into the sunny sky.

I looked back up at the other people in the room. Dumbledore seemed to be deeply staring at me, and thinking thoroughly at what he had just witnessed. McGonagall wore an expression of horror, which seemed to go with her disheveled look from the attack of ravens. Snape and Malfoy's faces were unreadable, but both held a type of seriousness I had never witnessed on their faces before. Harry's face caught me of guard, though. I would have that he would look at me in disgust or fright; instead, he looked worried and amazed.

"What's…happened to me?" No one answered. Harry was the only one that moved to stand close to me. He took my hand, as he knew that brought me some comfort.

"Sir?" Harry asked.

Dumbledore walked up to us. "Ms. Granger would you please show me your left forearm."

I frowned. Why? I did as instructed, though. As I lifted up my sleeve inch by inch, I noticed black curved lines, which formed something a kin to a tribal tattoo. My eyes widened. I looked to Dumbledore for guidance and reassurance. I found neither; he looked as confused as I did. He clutched at my arm inspecting each line.

"Severus, take Ms. Granger to your office. I'll be there shortly," Dumbledore commanded. Snape moved next to Dumbledore, without question and protest.

"Follow me, Ms. Granger."

I nervously let go of Harry's had before doing so. As I walked to the stairs, I noticed Malfoy had been very silent throughout the whole ordeal. I looked up at his face as I passed him. His expression was still a mystery to me, but his eyes let off unspoken worry. Was he worried for me?

"Come along, Ms. Granger," Snape said, pulling me out of my thoughts.

After the first step down, I let out a relieved sigh. I was thankful for not being there any longer. All the judgmental stares were wearing me down.

"Professor, what happened?" I asked once we were a good distance away from the tower.

He slightly faltered in his strides.

"Old magic, Ms. Granger. Magic, I will never understand," he replied.

"Old magic doesn't scare Dumbledore. He embraces it… so what's different," I asked, trying to get more information.

"The difference is, this is dark magic, and he has seen this type of magic," he said with anger in his voice. It scared me, but I did not deter.

"He's seen this before… When? Who did this happen to?" I asked anxiously.

He stopped walking, and turned abruptly towards me. Dread took over his features, as did hate. I swallowed nervously. I was not going to like his reply.

"Yes… He has seen this type of occurrence before, only once, though. It was long ago, in times when there was not so much tension and prejudice as now. The outcome was a disaster. It is why we are in dark times," he told me. My eyes widened at his explanation. His insinuation was too appalling. It was mad!

"Sir, you can be saying that… that Tom Riddle…," my words fell silent on my lips. It made sense, but I did not want to believe that Voldemort had been the creation of this magic.

"Sharp as always, Ms. Granger. Yes, you-know-who was the person, the other case. How do you think he invented the dark mark, or learnt to speak to snakes? The same thing happened to him. Dumbledore was fooled into believing good could come out of it, though. He believed in Tom, too much, and in the end was betrayed," Snape seethed.

"The raven… it appeared to me seven months ago in dreams and thoughts. I am so confused, right now… Will I end up like him? Will I betray Harry?" I asked, revealing my fears. My voice sounded panicked and weak.

"I honestly don't know, Ms. Granger," he told me truthfully.

"It's okay… I don't know either."

He snorted. "Is that supposed to bring me some form of consolation? You, not, knowing what side you'll be on by the end of all of this?"

"No, but for once I don't know the answer," I told him painfully.

I began to walk, leaving him with a sorrowful expression. He caught up quickly, though, and for the rest of the walk, we were silent.

The halls were empty, as students were already in their first period classes. Inwardly I was a storm of dread, sorrow, panic, and fright. What would happen to me? Would I become so mad at the world that I would switch sides? Could I hurt the people I had come to love, such as Tom? Would my grades slip from missing the first day of class? Why was life so difficult?

"Ms. Granger would you please calm down. I can feel your distress, and I'm not even empathic," Snape sneered.

I frowned. "I'm sorry, sir. It's just that I missed first class," I said meekly.

"Sort out your priorities, girl. There are more things to life than just grades," he scorned. I fiddled with the hem of my sleeve. I made my face a mask clear of emotions.

"I know my priorities. I know they seem foolish, but I don't care what you think," I hissed at him.

He ignored me, but thankfully, we came upon a portrait. A curly blonde haired man sat in a love seat painting a willow tree. What caught my attention was not the beautiful greens and gold's of the portrait, but blonde man that had striking violet eyes.

"Liquid Luck," Snape drew out clearly. The man inclined his had in understanding, and the portrait clicked open. No light radiated from inside, and I was cautious going in. it felt like I was in the dark woods, no light and a creepy uneasy feeling in my stomach.

"Lumos," Snape called out, and then there was light.

It was a tunnel, but it looked more like a catacomb. Skulls lined up the left wall and bones lined up the right one. I took a step back and drew out my wand.

"What going on?" I asked.

I heard Snape sigh before turning around.

"Don't worry Ms. Granger. The bones and skulls are all wood. They ward off annoying children that want to come snooping around. I'm not taking you to meet your unfortunate death, or whatever it is your know-it-all brain was thinking," Snape explained with annoyance.

I raised an eyebrow at the insult and tone, but lowered my wand. I did not put it away, though. He might have said the bones were fake, but they still crept me out. The solid smooth feeling of my wand brought me comfort.

We finally came to a green door with gold designs gracing the edges of it. As we went in, I was assaulted with a bright flash of light. They sun from the windows on the ceiling poured in, and my eyes closed at the sudden change of lighting. When the sting from the light stopped, I was shocked to find all four walls stocked with books. The floors were a red type of wood and the room had its splashes of gold and white, but the dominant color was emerald green. I was in awe. The room was beautiful, even if the furniture was kept to a minimum, a black desk with silver lining, a green couch, and two green chairs in frond of the desk.

I heard a pop and found Dumbledore sitting in one of the green chairs. Snape was behind his desk sipping on a cup of tea.

"Would you like some tea, Ms. Granger," Dumbledore offered.

"No thank you, sir."

"I'll have a cup, Severus, and maybe a shot of that Fire Whiskey you keep around," he casually said. I gave him an incredulous look, which he did not see because I was behind him.

"Ms. Granger, as Severus has told you, I have seen this happen before. Tom became obsessed with his newfound strength. He wanted to test his limitations, but in the process, he lost who he was. He became a monster," Dumbledore said after several minutes, his back still facing me.

"Sir, why does… why did it happen to us?" I asked, a bit uncomfortable with the situation.

"I know not. It hasn't happened to purebloods, and it's not related to any form of inheritance," he answered.

I frowned. So much was unknown on this topic. I started to think back to the first time I had seen the raven. I had just finished a bottle of my mother's antidepressants. I was sure it was a hallucination, so I thought nothing of it. When you are set on dying you do not care about your world anymore, so why would I stop and think about, what I thought at the time, a hallucination. I felt my throat become dry, and my eyes start to sting at the memory. Suddenly it dawned on me. The raven appeared to me in a time of depression. Thinking back, I remember the feeling of defeat coursing through my soul. It seemed that no matter how much I had tried to make my parents proud I had failed. They would forever hate me for what I had done, and so would I.

"Professor, what his childhood like?" I asked in a small voice.

I saw him stiffen. Snape too seemed to be curious as he straightened in his chair.

"His mother was a pureblood, but she fell in love with a muggle man. He harbored no feeling towards her, though, besides lust. Tom's mother was beautiful; no denying that, but the man never saw her as anything. One drunken night, they slept together, and Tom was the result. Tom's mother, Gia, fooled herself into believing he would stay with her. He was wealthy and had the means to take care of them, but that was not the case. He told her that it was her fault for whoring around, and that he would not spend a dime on her or his child. He never came back after that. Gia tried to get close to him again, but had no luck… She fell into a deep depression, and an even worse one after Tom was born. She barely looked after him, and he had to grow up fast. Poor Tom, he tried to keep them both fed, but he was only a child. Gia died one winter, and Tom was sent to an orphanage. He had no friends there. He was just too different… I came to get him when he was eleven. His magic was too strong and wild to be kept near muggles," he summed.

"What about his adolescence?"

"He was a hard worker, and a good student. His grades were the highest of his year. He was the brightest wizard of his age. I tried to teach him everything I knew, and he learned quickly. I was so proud of that boy. He was lonely, though. I could see that. He did not fit in with the rest of his housemates. Sometimes I saw hate and sadness in his eyes, but nonetheless he continued. One day the dark magic came. I witnessed it myself, you see. Such as you, he fell to the ground and was surrounded by darkness. After that he became obsessive and greedy," he replied.

I swallowed nervously. His story sounded eerily similar to my life's story, and I could not help thinking that Dumbledore was just a silly old man who refused to see what had been in front of him the whole time. I also felt a bit defensive, as he called the power that coursed through my body evil. Maybe my definition of evil was different from his.

"Sir, maybe it wasn't this magic that turned him greedy and selfish," I told him.

He turned towards me, an angry look on his face. "Do not speak of what you know nothing about," he seethed coldly.

My eyes widened a bit in shock. He was angry with me. Why? What I said was right, and he knew it.

"You see, though, I do know something about everything. One, not everything is black and white. Two, when you are kicked out into the world and slapped around by it, you become like the ones that hurt you. Three, stop defending him. He is trying to kill you and everyone that has 'dirty blood!'…Is it really me that knows nothing about the matter, or you?" I asked coldly.

All of a sudden, I felt something powerful and dangerous emit from him. Before it could be unleashed, he disappeared. He had apperated out of the room.

"Ms. Granger, it would be wise to not anger the person that is trying to help you get rid of whatever has befallen you," Snape drawled out.

I clenched my teeth in frustration. Finally, I ended up laughing. I laughed so hard it felt mad, in fact, tears started to leak out of my eyes. At first, they were tears of laughter, but then they turned to true tears. I was crying and I was not sure why.

"Are you sure he's trying to help? From where I am standing, he would risk his life for Tom, or give it up, either way it screws us over… You want to know something else. I do not think I want this power gone. It makes me happy, and… I don't want that feeling to go away!" I exclaimed.

I heard him sigh, and I looked over to him. He looked at me with an expression that read concern.

"From now on… if Dumbledore has some new information, I want you to tell me not him. You are the only one that is actually worried for me. Genuinely, worried for my being. You're foolish for that doing that, but it's your business," I said.

"Ms. Granger, in order for me to help you. You have to trust me, and vise versa."

"Fine."

"I have a few conditions, though."

I frowned. "Name them."

"Have you heard of the apprenticeships we offer here at Hogwarts?"

I shook my head no.

"Interesting, I was so sure a know-it-all such as you would. No matter all of the teachers here at Hogwarts are aloud to have apprentices, two being the limit. These students get a free pass from all their classes if they do the apprentice work. Meaning Ms. Granger, you would only work for the teacher that chooses you, and you would not have to attend any other classes. With the exception of the two new classes for this year. Those you must take," Snape explained, the look of annoyance back on his face.

"Are you asking me to be your apprentice?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Yes, it is your honor, I know" he told me arrogantly. I raised a sarcastic eyebrow at him

"Is this your only condition?" I asked.

"No, you will also have to work alongside Draco, as he is my other apprentice. You will have to trust him as you trust me, and before you interrupt me, Draco is loyal to me. He will not tell anyone of the secrets or problems you are dealing with. My next condition is that you learn occlumency and legilimency. Also, since you are my apprentice, remember you are at my disposal without complaining. Now that's all," he finished.

I stood silent for a few moments. This would be good apprenticeships are valued here, and it would look good on my record. Trusting Malfoy would be difficult, nearly impossible, but maybe I could get around it.

"I accept."

**Hope you liked and just to clarify this is set around sixth year, but it is not H/B compliant. Review, alert, etc! And sorry if there are any grammatical mistakes, or missing words and letters=p**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for alerting, and favoring and to ****gottaloveva**** for reviewing!**

**Disclaimer- I don't own Harry potter =c**

One: breathe. Two: smile. Three: bare the pain… Mum had sent me a letter today.

_Hermione,_

_Your brother's anniversary is the first of next month. _

_We have informed your headmaster, and he has given you permission to leave the school on that day._

_Dress accordingly, and don't be late._

_The Sterling's have also invited us to a celebration that evening._

_They want our family to attend their son's wedding._

_Buy proper attire for that event, too, and don't be late._

_Also find a proper date; we don't want you looking like a lonely prude in front of them._

_-Charlotte Granger- _

'Yes, mother,' I thought. The morning mail had arrived, and left me with a sick feeling. I folded up the letter, and put it in my pocket. As I did yesterday, I left with an apple in hand. I didn't go to the astronomy tower, though. I walked towards the greenhouse. Madam Sprout should still be at breakfast, leaving her greenhouse empty.

You would expect the magical world's vegetation to all be as strange as the mandrakes, but most looked astonishingly normal. The only exception being that each had strange powers if ingested put into a potion, etc.

As I walked around I found a small, black, metal bench in the middle of the room. Surrounding it were blue roses, that apparently did exist, and small vines that spilled into the small stony path and coiled around the bench. I sat down, and admired the room. It was huge, and the glass above was clear and clean, unlike many muggle greenhouses I'd visited in the past. The vibrant colors of the flowers illuminated in the sun's rays, and the green stems and leaves seemed lusher.

I took off my robe, leaving me in my skirt, and buttoned up collared shirt. I decided the letter that I was sent was too stressful. In my own way I began to rebel against my mother. I unbuttoned my shirt, and opened it up to reveal my red tank top. I took off my shoes and threw them lightly, careful not to hit any flowers or plants, in front of me. My black socks were thrown on top of my robe, which lay beside me on the bench. Finally I felt a bit more liberated. Mother would hate the state of my attire. She would probably glare discretely at me, and say my name in a sickly sweet manner, warning me to fix the problem.

I sneered at the memory. I was about to eat me apple when I remembered something. Out of all the things mother hated, my hair being loose and messy unnerved her to no end. I set my apple in my lap, and began to untie my hair. I made sure to ruffle it up at the ends and shake it loose into a state of disarray. There, now I felt so much more at peace.

I picked up my apple, and took a satisfying bite. Its juice was sweet and tart. I let out a sigh of content and crisscrossed my legs. I rested my elbow on my thigh, and continued eating. Mother would definitely not approve.

Suddenly, rustling sounds were heard, along with sensual female moans. I let out an exasperated sigh, and rolled my eyes. Of course, asking for peace and quite was obviously too much to ask for. In a school with hormone ridden students, peace was a no.

A tangle of limbs came to view and fell to the floor. Draco Malfoy and some fifth year lay groping at each other. His hips grinded she into the stony path, keeping her pressed there. She stayed absolutely still. This was probably her first time. His hand began fondling her thighs until he made it to her core. Her breath came in fast shallow gasps and his grunts finally became noticeable. My stomach churned.

"Hey! I'm trying to fucking eat! Go fornicate in a closet broom," I called out to them in lazy annoyance, but disgust evident in my tone.

The girl screeched in shock, at being caught, and slightly began to push Malfoy off. She was too weak to manage anything, though. Malfoy stiffened, and attempted to catch his breath. He turned to look at me with an accusing glare. I shrugged at him, and he let out an inpatient sigh. He got off the girl, and adjusted his appearance. The girl, a Ravenclaw, buttoned her shirt, and fixed her disheveled hair.

"Go," Malfoy told her coldly. She gave him a hurt look and ran out of there. I continued eating as I had been before. After sometime I felt Malfoy's stare on me.

"What?"

"There's a damn cafeteria," he said.

I looked at him in mock shock. "Really? I always thought that was the dungeon!"

"Fuck you, Granger. You always ruin my fun," he stated. I ignored his comment. He came over to the bench, and moved my stuff closer to me. He sat down and leaned back into the bench's backrest. We both sat in silence, until I finished my apple and threw it into the bushes. I turned to look at him. His head was leaned back, as he stared at the sky.

"So, Granger where's Saint Potter? I haven't seen him around much, finally got tired of you?" he mocked.

I rolled my eyes, but his words still hurt. He was right Harry wasn't at breakfast today, and after I had left Snape's office yesterday I never saw him once, either.

"He's around. Don't worry the both of you can find time to compare whose dick is bigger, in private, later," I snapped.

His eyes widened a bit, and he looked over towards me. I raised an eyebrow at his reaction. He chuckled as he turned his head back up towards the sky. I grinned. His Adam's apple bobbed up and down.

"I didn't know you knew how to curse and joke crudely, Granger. Ten points to Gryffindor," he joked.

"There's a lot I can do, Malfoy," I retorted, not at all meaning that in any seductive manner.

"Don't overestimate yourself, Granger."

"And don't you underestimate me, Malfoy."

He shrugged.

"Why aren't you at breakfast?" he asked.

"It's too noisy," I said simply. He didn't have to know McGonagall and Dumbledore kept staring at me with scrutinizing gazes.

"Uncle Sev. told me you're the other apprentice, my co-worker of sorts," he stated.

"Oh… he told you already," I said, more to my self than him.

"Yes… it's dangerous work sometimes."

"If you're trying to scare me off, it's not going to work. I won't let…"

"Not at all. Uncle Severus has made us his legacy through this position. He will teach us everything he's ever learnt… he's Slytherin's head of dorm for a reason. He favors dark magic… I trust his judgment above all else, though. If he picked you, then the bastard must see great potential… What I'm trying to say is that from this moment and onwards I will be civil enough to have your back on any missions we're sent on. With out me you sure as hell won't survive," he said, an arrogant smirk gracing his lips at the last statement.

I scoffed. "Malfoy, now I think you're overestimating yourself… but thanks."

After a moment I asked, "Snape's your uncle?"

"My godfather," he replied.

So that's why he always favored Malfoy. It all made sense now. 'That bastard!' I thought.

The bell rung, and signaled the end of breakfast. Malfoy got up slowly, and began to strut away. He stopped right as he was about to leave my view. I waited for him to leave, but he turned to me with an expectant look.

"What?" I asked.

"You're first day as an apprentice starts in lest than six minutes. Snape hates tardiness. Are you coming or not?" he said coolly.

My eyes widened in shock. I looked down at my self, and saw the state of my appearance. I groaned in annoyance.

Malfoy came back to the bench, and grabbed my stuff. I was about to protest when he motioned me to follow him.

"Just change on the way," he shrugged.

I nodded.

I grabbed a sock out of his arms, and attempted to put it on, all while trying to keep up with Malfoy's long strides. I'm sure I resembled Winnie the Pooh's friend, Tigger, as he bounced on his tail.

I heard Malfoy try to stifle a chuckle. I looked up and gave him a glare that would put Snape to shame. He ended up laughing at me even more. I gave out a long exasperated sigh. This was going to be a long day.

We made it to Snape's class with a minute to spare, and my hair, shirt, robe and shoes looked perfect. It seemed Snape didn't have a first class. The room was completely empty, except for an overgrown centipede on Snape's front desk.

I felt like running out of the room. The thing looked like a man eating beast! Its shell was incredibly smooth looking, as if it were billions of roaches put together to form it. The worst feature it had were its legs. They were like small fangs that seemed to wait for some unfortunate soul to fall into its clutches. I shivered involuntarily.

"Scared, Granger?" Malfoy mocked. I glared at him, yet I moved to stand behind him. Maybe if the beast decided it was hungry, it would go for the closest person.

"No, it's simply an overgrown bug," I lied.

"Good, then perhaps you would like to be the one to collect its venom," Snape's voice said from a dark corner of the room.

"It would be my pleasure," I stated. I wouldn't let them see my fear.

Snape came out of the shadows with two large flasks in hand. He held them out for me expectantly. I bit the inside of my cheek to stop myself from cursing at my foolishness. I took the flasks from his hand. He smirked down at me. This stopped me from admitting my fear. I would prove to him that I could do this.

I remember reading once that these creatures were very defensive. They feared what was bigger than them. Although, this centipede was big, I still loomed over it. I could maybe use this to my advantage.

As I got closer, it turned sharply towards me. This caused me to jump a bit in surprise. For a second I heard it growl. I swallowed nervously. Stupid book was wrong! This beast wasn't scared; it was just too damn hostile! I saw it open its mouth and move its poisonous claws at me. My heart beat faster in fright. Suddenly, it moved straight towards me an inch. I flinched, and did the worst possible thing that could endanger my life. I stepped back. The centipede was only trying to test me. If it could scare me, then it could kill me. I had showed it that it could, and now there was no turning back. I realized my mistake, too late. The beast had climbed off the desk, and was headed straight towards me.

I heard fast shuffling behind me, but I was too scared to move. My arm began to burn, though, and as the centipede was about to attack a thick black wall of fog spilled in front of it, putting a barrier between me and it. Flapping sounds were heard from behind me, and soon the mysterious raven stood perched on my right shoulder. It let out a loud alarming screech, and soon the fog made its way back into me. The familiar feeling that it left me with never ceased to surprise me.

I found the centipede still as stone in front of me. It was bowing to me, and posed no threat.

I let out a slight sighed of relief. The raven cawed at me. I looked over to it in question. His eyes showed that he wanted me to do my task. I nodded in understanding.

I took the flasks and put them both on one of the beast's fangs. A goop like substance fell in slow waves down the tubes, until they were half way full. When I was done I backed away slowly, and made my way back to Snape's side. The centipede crawled back up the desk and coiled itself into a loose ball.

I turned back over to Snape. He was giving me a stern expression.

"Your mistake, Ms. Granger?" he asked.

"Letting it know my fear by stepping back," I replied. He nodded.

"Anything you'd like to add on, Draco?"

"No, the poor thing was scared out of her wits… not you Granger. I was talking about Tali," he responded. I gave him a nasty look.

"Had it not been for your bird, you would have been poisoned," Snape stated, breaking apart our antics.

I nodded.

"Draco, take the flasks to storage. Make sure to catalog them," he instructed Malfoy.

Malfoy nodded. He came up to me and took the flasks from me. His gaze lingered on the raven and my left arm before turning and disappearing through one of the room's doors. I frowned.

"Professor does he know?" I asked him.

"Yes, I've told him about it," He responded.

I looked at him with uncertainty. Malfoy had tormented me for the last six years, and his father was a death eater. Death eaters destroyed the Weasley family, so how could I trust him? How could I trust any of them? I felt my eyes begin to sting as remember that my second family had been hurt.

"Let's be frank, Ms. Granger. I know you feel untrusting of us, and that's good. One should never put too much trust in a random person, for that is how one gets killed or swindled. You know Draco's father is a… death eater, but what you do not know is that my old friend has had a change of heart. Lucius knows the dark lord to be unjust and his views unfair, but once you're in that life there's no going back. Draco has witnessed how unfair the dark lord has been to his father, so he too wishes to get out of the life his father foolishly set out for him. Yet, he's trapped. The dark lord expects Draco to one day follow him in his ranks. You may not trust Draco, Ms. Granger, but I assure you he will not harm you on the account of the dark lord," Snape told me.

I looked up into his eyes and found that there was no deceit hidden within them. He believed his words, and he believed in Malfoy. I nodded weakly. I understood him, and in my heart I believed him, but I had picked up a long time ago to never trust a person to change.

"I can only tell you that… from this point on, I will try to believe that Malfoy is a…, well for lack of better wording, decent human being. Do forgive me if I can't, though. That will solely depend on his behavior… See, I put my faith in facts. They somehow always point you in the right direction, and the fact is that Malfoy Sr. tried to kill us last year, but luckily the people I cared for live. Yet, Bellatrix killed Sirius in that same attack, and Harry was hurt by it… Not too long ago, there was a raid on the Weasley house, and all of them got hurt. They were… so important to me. So can you really blame me for being weary of Slytherins, most will be death eaters when they grow up!" I argued. I was pretty sure I was close to hysteria, now.

Snape took my words into account, but before he could say anything to defend his house, the raven cawed on my shoulder, warning me that there was someone behind me. We both looked over and found Malfoy standing there limply. His face was set into a stony expression. For a few moments we just stood there in deafening silence.

"Do you think we have a CHOICE, Granger? You stand there PREACHING about how we're all evil, but do you think we get a choice? DAMN YOU! Our grandparents chose our life. They drill the dark lord's bullshit into us from the day we're born. The ones that grow up to see its wrong, find that they can't walk out of it. We'll be killed if we do, or our families will be annihilated! I wouldn't expect perfect, Granger, to understand, though! You've always had it easy! It's fair time you stop reading your stupid fairytales, because YOU'RE NOT IN ONE," Malfoy seethed in raw anger. His voice was low, but loud. He seemed like a rabid dog. This side of him took me off guard, at first. I had never seen him this mad, which said a lot. Yet, the part about my life being perfect snapped me out of it. Now there were two angry animals in the room, and it wasn't going to end well.

"SHUT UP! YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME… I'm not saying you're evil, but because of the life that was chosen for you, you will betray me. In the end everyone will always betray you, and both of you are no different! You may not want to be a death eater, but in the end you will most likely become one. I never said you would like it, though. It's just a fact. So don't YOU PREACH to me about how only you and your friend's lives are so fucked up. Harry never had parents, and was stuck with his horrid aunt's family. Harry was treated like their damn slave! Luna lost her mom when she was young, and grew up longing her warmth. Neville… well everyone knows his story. You can thank your insane aunt for that! And Lavender use to have an uncle that would beat her. He even came close to raping her! So don't you dare preach about your damn pain!" I yelled out at him. He possessed all I had said, but in the end started chuckling sinisterly.

"It's funny; you can't say anything about yourself. Can you? You've never really had to go through anything rough. You've never had to make a terrifying decision. Is that why you read all those books? Do you pretend it's you? Is that why? So that you can have something to experience? You're pathetic. You've never lost someone, or gotten beaten up by life. So why don't you fuck off?" he drawled out.

I something snap within me. Tears felt silently from my eyes. Trickling down to my chin, and falling to the floor or my robes. I wanted to hurt someone. No, I wanted to hurt Draco Malfoy.

I stumbled over to him, as my tears blurred my vision. My hand flew from my side and across Malfoy's cheek. The slap echoed through out the class, and his head was bent over to one side, his bangs covering up his eyes. An ugly red mark was left, but I could care less. His eyes lifted to meet mine in a glare.

"Fuck you, Draco Malfoy," I gritted out. With that, I fled the room.

At one point while I ran down the halls, the raven flew off my shoulder, but I could hear him behind me. He was almost noiseless, but the air around him made a subtle swishing sound from how fast he was flying. As I ran I saw that the bell was going to ring in a few minutes. That would mean people swarming the halls, noisy in their steps, and loud in their conversations. Plus my eyes were puffy and red from crying. I needed to get out of here.

I ended up near the dark lake. Unconsciously, I shuddered. I wasn't afraid of bodies of water. I just hated the guts out of them. Suddenly, I remembered why, and the harsh words of Malfoy came back to my head.

He was wrong. I had lost someone, and it was my fault. I had done something bad, too, even if it was defending the one I loved.

The painful memories clenched at my heart, and tore through it, leaving wounds too deep to heal. I closed my eyes tightly, and I squatted to the ground, as I clutched my head. Maybe the memories would go away?

"Please, go away, please," I whispered to myself. "I don't want to remember anymore."

My voice sounded broken to my ears, and I felt disgust rise in my chest. Why was I so weak?

Heat started to form on my arm, and I had to open my eyes in curiosity. The wispy fog spilled from it, and from it formed dozens of ravens. They flew around me in sync. The silver eyed raven, as the leader of the flock. I stared brokenly at them. My eyes pleaded them to help me.

They all let out shrill cries, as they passed me by in circles. To anyone else it would sound frightening, and horrid, but to me it sounded like promises. They promised me power, and stability. They promised never to betray me, and never to leave me to fend for myself. They were mine. They belonged to me, and with them I could take down an empire if I wanted to. All I had to do was lead.

They believed in me, and that's all I could really ask for. At that moment, I accepted them. I accepted their help because that's really all they had done since I had met them.

As if someone was controlling my movements, I picked up a sharp small stone. I sliced my left wrist first, below my mark, and my right arm followed after that. Red, silky liquid began to pour from the jagged wounds. My blood felt warm as it ran down my hands and arms.

I held them out and suddenly one by one each raven came down to drink from them. Each looked into my eyes as they drank. They were pledging their allegiance to me, and with my blood, we would forever be bonded.

It felt like hours before each raven had drank some of my blood. The only one left was the raven with silver eyes. As he swept down with grace all the other ravens flew quietly.

The feel of his beak scraping against my skin made my happy. It was a confusing feeling, but it was pleasing.

After he had drank the blood he soared above me, and let out a strong and frightening cry. The rest followed in suit.

I heard a rumble from the sky as if it were replying back to them, to us. The sky grew dark, all of a sudden and lightning followed in tow.

The ravens dissolved into the black wispy fog again and soaked up into my skin. Only the silver eyed raven remained, until he swooped towards me. He rested on my shoulder, and sent me a look of pride. I smiled, but my body became increasingly tired.

The last thing I remember before I let darkness claim me was rain beginning to drizzle on me.

**A/N: What do you think? Review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: thank you all for the reviews! **

'Mione,' a child's voice said in the distance. I turned to look around but there wasn't a soul to be seen. What I found strange was that I was in the mansion's kitchen. Pots and pans lined the walls neatly, waiting to be used. Everything was squeaky clean, though. The chefs must be out today.

I looked down to the green jade tiles. My eyes watered slightly at the sight before me. A familiar small child sat there Indian style.

"Nick, what are you doing down there, sweetheart?" I called down to the child. His hair was littered with adorable silky brown curls. They slightly bounced up and down when he moved his head up to look at me. His hazel eyes had a slight wetness to them that made me frown.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I squatted down to his level. I placed a comforting hand on his cheek.

"Mom and dad promised they would be here, today," he sniffled out. I scowled. They were supposed to be here since yesterday. It was Nick's eighth birthday, after all. I sighed in deeply.

"I know. They called while you were still sleeping this morning. They said to tell you 'sorry that they won't be able to make it', but Anita would be taking care of arranging the party. They also said that they love you," I lied.

I felt bad for lying to Nick, but the kid was so torn up about this. All they had really done was sent Anita, their event planner, over to tell me that they couldn't be here. If I told my brother that he would be heartbroken for days.

"They always do this!" Nick pouted. I rubbed his back in a soothing manner. I couldn't contradict him there. The last time they had been here for one of Nick's birthday parties was when he was four.

"I know, but you know how busy they are. They have their own company to run, and being wealthy comes at a price… but whatever, right? Come on lets go get ready for that damn party of yours. Your guests will be arriving any time soon, and if you're not ready Anita will have a fit, well after she comes home from the hospital for having high stress levels," I joked.

Nick giggled at that. It had happened once. Anita had just plopped down on the ground, without warning. She was taken out in an ambulance, and told to take anti-anxiety pills. She had only been planning a cookout.

I laughed and picked him up to his feet. I shriveled his hair up a bit before running out of the kitchen, a whining Nick in peruse.

Cold overtook my senses, and I was no longer in a beautiful memory of the past. My body felt sore and cold. My wrists felt numb, and my head throbbed slightly. I let out a shaky breath before opening my eyes a bit. The ceiling above me was grand and stony, yet elegant and intricate in design. In the luminescence of the candle lights that lit the room, you could see specks of gold and red jewels incrusted in it.

I was in the infirmary, there was no doubt. Only the infirmary had this ceiling. I had noticed it when I lay petrified from the basilisk's reflection in second year.

I felt presences to my left. I turned to look, and saw Snape and Malfoy standing there. As soon as they noticed my movement, they looked across the room.

"She's awake," Malfoy said.

My eyes widened a bit. Someone else was here? I had a feeling about who they were. I hoped I was wrong, though. I slowly turned to look to my right.

My mother and father sat in two chairs that lined the wall. They were looking at me with annoyance and disappointment. I turned to face my left, again. I would rather gaze upon Snape and Malfoy than see their expressions.

"We were called here in urgency. They said an accident had occurred…but did it really, Hermione?" my mother asked with a cold voice. I swallowed, and closed my eyes. I didn't want to be here.

"Look at me when I am talking to you," she spat out.

I did as she asked. She was now at my bedside. My father still sat in his chair, a distant expression in his eyes. I looked at my mother's face.

"Good. Now, we were just closing up a deal in Dubai, and we need to head back out there as soon as possible. There are some other matters that need attending," she said.

I nodded.

"Why are you here, then?" I asked bitterly.

"We came to inform you that when you get home for the summer you'll be put back into rehab. Accidents such as these just don't happen. It'll be a new place, though. The last one promised us results, and seeing as we're here…they obviously lied," she informed me.

I frowned. I managed to painfully sit up in bed, though. I needed strength and I couldn't confront her lying down.

"I'm not going back." I said forcefully. I was suddenly aware of Malfoy and Snape witnessing a bit of my private life. The life I never planned to reveal to anyone, but things never went as planned for me.

"Excuse me?"

"I said I not going back."

"You will, end of discussion. You can get fixed there," she said with conviction.

"I'm a human being! I don't need to be fixed! Besides stuffing pills down my throat till I'm on cloud nine doesn't even help…WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE? What you couldn't call one of your assistants to come down here and check up on me?" I gritted out at her.

Her expression was thunderous.

"I was curious to see if you had actually died this time. The headmasters tone was urgent, and I thought for sure you had succeeded this time," she said casually.

"LEAVE!" I roared at her.

She slapped me. I was so infuriated, and at that moment I fell like a dam had been broken with in me. She was suddenly flung over to a wall behind her. Black magic poured out from me in waves, protecting me for anymore oncoming assaults. My father was instantly by her side pulling her up to her feet. Malfoy and Snape were also in front of her, blocking my view of her.

I could see they were shocked at what had happened, but they were also trying to keep the peace.

"You will never touch me again in your retched life," I hissed at her. The magic lessened, but if you looked closely it was still there, waiting for someone to make the wrong move.

She managed to get back on her feet, but she was angry. She rammed through my father and the others. My magic flared again keeping her a good distance from my bed.

"You ungrateful bitch. After what you did, you should be thankful we didn't disown you! Your brother died because of you! My baby boy died because of you, you stupid freak. I HATE YOU! AND I CURSE THE DAY I EVERY GAVE BIRTH TO YOU!" she yelled at me. By the end of her rant my father had started dragging her out of the room. She was yelling more profanities at me, but I blocked them out. I literally put up a ward against sound on the room. Snape had left with them, also helping my father drag out my mother.

Malfoy were still here, though, and I began to feel self conscious. I tried looking everywhere else besides him. Tears were threatening to spill from eyes, and I didn't want him to see.

'Nick, I'm so sorry,' I thought. I kept repeating that like a mantra, until a tear fell to my hands. I squeezed the sheets hard.

'No! Don't cry!' I exclaimed to myself. It didn't help, though. Soon, I found that crying was the only thing I could do. They were silent tears, though, or at least I think they were. The blood rushing to my ears was overwhelmingly loud.

"I should have…it was my entire fault," I whispered to myself. The guilt I felt in my heart now overwhelmed me.

"You can cry, Granger. I won't think any less of you. I promise," I heard Malfoy say. I looked over to where he was and found him in the chair where my father had been. He was leaned forward with his head in his hands. His body looked exhausted, and perturbed at the situation. For some odd reason I felt his words liberate me from my prison. I did just as he said. I cried. I cried sorrowfully, and miserably. I cried at the shambles my life was, and for my brother.

Eventually, my eyes became heavy with sleep. My tears had stopped a while ago, but Malfoy was still there in his seat. He had a distant expression on his face. We were both quiet, pondering on the scandalous events that led up to this point. When my eyes became heavy with sleep, I gratefully let the darkness envelope me.

"Hermione! Help me!" A frantic voice screamed. Pure terror laced into every word. My heart was pounding in my chest, and the helpless feeling that engulfed me never ceased to let up.

"Nick!" I replied to the scream.

I was in a forest, miles away from where we lived. Everything looked unfamiliar. Rain was pouring from the sky as if it too were crying for our situation.

I tried to look for any signs of my brother, but all I saw were trees, vegetation, rocks, and mud. Everything was so hazy.

"Hermione!" the terror had turned to panic, and that panic was the only thing fueling me to move. I ran as fast as I could towards my brother's scared voice. I tripped on many tree roots and rocks, and the smell of rain and mud was making me sick to my core.

A heart wrenching scream was the first thing I heard before making it to the small clearing that revealed a lake.

I looked around frantically until I noticed a red row boat in out in the restless water. On the boat were Nick and his captor. Nick was silent, though. In fact he was no longer moving. The captor turned around to look at me. In his eyes I saw panic and confusion. What shocked me was that he had a gun in his hand, and it was aiming straight at me. My mind went blank, and for a second I accepted it.

A shot rang out loudly through the air. I closed my eyes in instinct.

A few seconds went by when I heard another shot right before something heavy hit the water, followed by something lighter also falling to the water.

I opened my eyes quickly to see what had happened. The little red boat was abandoned. No on was there, not even my brother.

My heart felt like it dropped to my stomach. 'No,' I thought to no one in particular.

Rain poured on me, hitting me like small pieces of glass and chilling me like ice. Suddenly, a small head popped out of the water.

It was Nick! Around him seemed to flow something dark. It took me a second to realize that it was his blood that flowed around him in the unsteady waters. I gasped in painfully before sprinting off in the lake to rescue him.

The water was murky, and it chilled me to my very bone, but I did not deter. My muscles screamed in protest as I was about halfway to Nick, but I urged myself to keep swimming. My brother's life depended on this. The noise of the rain hitting the water and my body sloshing through it was the only thing that kept me from panicking.

I looked up to see if Nick was still holding on, but I saw that the spot where he had last been was empty. I swam faster and stronger until I reached the spot. I took a calm breath before going under to find him. The sound from above was drowned out, but as I tried to open my eyes I found that the water was too murky to see through. I would have to rely on touch. I searched frantically, but had no luck. I can up for another breath and found I was beginning to start sobbing.

As I went down deeper, I felt my hand brush against hair, curly hair. It was Nick! It had to be him! I took his small frame and guided it upwards. We broke through the surface, and I gasped for air. I instantly saw that Nick wasn't breathing.

I turned him around to where his back was towards me, and held him up by his shoulders. Without pausing I swam us to the red boat. By now my whole being felt fatigued, but I could not stop to take a break. It would mean my little brother's death.

"Come on, Nick," I said unconsciously to him, as I pushed him up on the boat. It was difficult with the water weighing us both down and the boat bobbing up and down. I managed. Once I got in the small boat I set him out on his back. I needed to get him breathing again! I listened again for his breath and found none. I tilted his head back, and pushed down on his chest three times before breathing into his mouth. I gave him CPR for a few minutes before he spit out water.

"Nick, I'm right here. You're going to be okay. I promise," I cried out.

He weakly turned to look at my. I suddenly noticed his pale face, and almost blue lips. I looked down and saw the color red everywhere. I ran my eyes over his body and saw a gaping wound on his stomach. Blood rushed out in waves. I put my hands over it to stop the bleeding, but I knew I was too late. I let out a defeated breath, and began to cry.

"You made it," Nick said to me in a weakened and small voice.

I sniffed loudly trying to get rid of my tears. In the process I ended up smearing some of my brother's blood on my face. I felt sick.

"I always do," I told him.

I stroked his hair, unconsciously memorizing its texture. 'Please, don't take him!' I begged the heavens.

"I was taken to a house. It was so scary, and dirty… I left my phone there… I also left you a letter… you need to find it," he gasped out. His wound was already taking its toll on him.

Suddenly, the boat began to sway. I looked over to see what had caused it and found a pair of hands clutching the rim. It was the captor. I quickly put myself between him and my brother. I looked down and saw him gasping for air.

"Help me, please," he gasped out. Suddenly, I felt rage. The man that had shot my brother was asking me to help him! I moved over to him. I grabbed his chin, and looked him straight in the eye. His eyes were a deep blue, and yellow specks could be seen in them, too. His face was worn and gruff, but his jaw line wasn't much defined.

With a swift jerk I pushed him underwater, and held him there. He struggled to get free. He scratched at my face and neck, but I didn't let him up. The splashing sounds he made, as his life ended in my hands, felt satisfying. The man tried to scream, but it only made him run out of air faster. I felt my face give out a sinister smile.

Finally his hands went limp, and the twitching ceased. At that point, I realized that I had just murdered a human being. I had taken a life, and I didn't need magic to do it. You didn't need magic to be dangerous, and I had just proved it. This realization hit me hard, and I began to weep again. The only signs of me crying were my sobs, as the rain masked my tears.

"Mione," my brother called. I rushed over to his side. I took his hand and held it in mine. It felt cold.

"I'm cold, Mione," he whispered.

I carefully brought him to my chest and cradled him my arms.

"I'm so sorry this ever happened…I'm so sorry you always craved for a real mom and dad…I'm so sorry that I can't save you. I'm sorry this was your life," I whispered to him. My voice was broken, and my hot tears had not ceased to stop. I felt him struggle to breath, and his body became even colder.

"Hermione, you were my best friend, my sister, and in a way my own mother…you have nothing to be sorry for," he said. My heart stung with his words. If only I had never gone to the ice cream shop.

"Will you sing to me," he asked finally.

I nodded lightly. I held him closer before my voice came out.

"If I talk real slowly, if I try real hardTo make my point dear, that you have my heartHere I go, I'll tell you what you already knowHere I go, I'll tell you what you already knowIf you love me with all of your heartIf you love meI'll make you a star in my universeYou'll never have to go to workYou'll spend every dayShining your light my wayIf I talk real slowly, if I hold your handIf you look real closely my loveYou might understandHere I go, I'll tell you what…''

I felt Nick's chest stop rising, and his small gasps of air cease. I looked down. He was still, and he was gone.

"Nick…Nick? Nick! Oh god, please. Please…no…no. Wake up, baby brother. PLEASE WAKE UP!" I urged, as I shook him. He was dead, and I knew it. I just couldn't accept it.

The reality of it all hit me hard, and I went into hysteria. I screamed for what seemed hours, but was really only seconds. My throat was raw, my muscles were sore, I was cold, but more importantly my baby brother was dead. I felt my eyes close numbly, and I let go of the world.

"Granger…Granger," I heard someone call from my dark sleep. I opened my eyes, which were wet and caused my vision to blur. Malfoy was beside my bedside. The room was bright with the day's light. I was back in my world.

"It's almost time to drink your medicine," Malfoy said.

I sat up in the bed. The white sheets rustled with my movements. Malfoy helped adjust my pillows. I looked at him strangely before pushing his hands away. It was out of character for him, and I wasn't comfortable with his niceness.

"Stop. You shouldn't strain yourself," he said in annoyance.

"You're acting nice. It's just new to me," I said.

"I'm not acting, and this is sort of my fault for pissing you off," he responded while pointing to my bandaged wrists. I looked down, and found I had momentarily forgotten of the incident. I looked up at Malfoy. He must have thought I had done this to kill myself or just relieve stress because of how he had acted.

"I wasn't…trying to kill myself, or hurt myself, and it wasn't because of you," I said to him. He looked at me with subtle disbelief.

"You cut yourself," he stated. 'The only reason anyone would cut themselves is because they are emotionally unstable,' was what that line translated to.

"I didn't do this because I was mad or unstable. I swear," I told him. For some odd reason I cared about what he thought.

"Then please explain what on earth did you think you were doing, Ms. Granger?" Snape's frustrated voice came from behind Malfoy.

His face looked angry, but I didn't feel scared. I felt sad because in some way I had disappointed him. I looked down at my hands in habit, as I pondered these new set of feelings. Snape and Malfoy had always been mean to me, and I had always disliked them, but now I felt something for them. I was beginning to trust them. I wanted them to understand me. I wanted them to get past the walls I had built around myself. In turn I also wanted to get to know them. I wanted to know about their lives and personalities. I wanted their friendship.

"Well?" Snape's voice cut through my thoughts.

"I was mad, so I didn't know where I was going. I just needed to get out of the school… I ended up near a small lake… I was reminded of something terrible, and the ravens came in my defense," I said vague on the details.

"Hermione, I want to help you," Snape said with a pleading voice. This caught my attention. Not only was his tone worried, but he had said my first name. This was something that he would never let happen, but it did. At that very moment, as I looked up at him in shock, I felt something change.

I nodded and let down my defenses.

"I need you to tell me every single detail. What you say will not leave our lips, unless you say it's alright," he said.

I nodded and knew that he was telling the truth.

"I ran because, like you saw, my life isn't perfect. My life is in shambles, and has been ever since I can remember. Malfoy was right. I read to escape, and because a person I hold dear to told me to read as much as I could…I may be pathetic for it, but it's how I cope… As I ran I didn't notice that I was running towards a lake. Lakes hold terrible memories for me… I should start at the beginning with this. You should pull up a chair," I told them.

They complied and I was thankful. I could take my time telling them one of the most painful experiences in my life.

"I used to have a younger brother. He was four years younger. His name was Nick Dorian Granger. He loved reading books and playing football (soccer), but he was always lonely. See, my family is very wealthy, and the name Granger means something in the muggle world. Most of the friends he had were also from wealthy families, but he didn't really get along with them. He always thought they were brats, and I fully agree. He liked to hang out with normal people, but my mom wouldn't have any of that. She said we were too high up to be associating with common people. As a result Nick didn't have many friends. He tried getting close with our parents, but they were always on a damn business trip, so all we had was each other. I was there for every birthday, school event, social event, sports event, etc. I saw him take his first steps as a toddler. I even taught him how to swim and ride a bike. We were close because in the world we grew up in, where deceit, greed, and strategy rule, we needed each other to stay sane…the day I lost him was the day I lost my sanity. My mother and father were out on one of their many trips. They had been out for three months already, and Nick was missing them. Sure he knew they weren't much of parents, but we always appreciated every minute we had in their presence. He missed dad most of all, and so he was a bit sad. I hated seeing my brother sad, so I told him that we were going out to have some fun. We went to a circus, the park, and much to his annoyance shopping. We were heading back, but I was craving some ice cream. We stopped by this beautiful shop. I remember it was called Paradise Kiss. It had only been in business for five months. As we went in I saw there was a man that kept staring at us strangely… I should have walked out then, but I was so stupid. While was ordering our sweets, I told Nick to go pick us a table. He reminded me to order extra sprinkles… He was smiling as he left… When I got done ordering I looked around and saw he wasn't in the shop. I looked in the restrooms, too, but he was gone. I asked a couple that was sitting near the exit if they had seen my brother. Their response was the worst news possible. They said that the man had taken the boy out. They said that they thought it was his father. At that moment I realized Nick had been kidnapped. I called the police. They said he had probably just wondered off, as he had only been gone a few minutes… I used my family's name and money to make them ignore that fact. In my world kidnappings and ransom were not new. They looked the whole day for my brother, and couldn't find him. The whole mansion was in uprising, and they were the only people to give me comfort. Nick and I had become friends with the household's staff, and I know they held us dear to their hearts… when my parents came home they gave me no such comfort. My mother's reasoning was that the whole thing had been my fault. Nick would have never been taken if I had not gone out with him that day, and she was right. Three days went by and Nick was still missing. The police was at our house trying to come up with a plan to make the guy appear again. My parents were going to make an announcement on a news broadcast, and they were going to offer up half a million euros. The police was planning to tempt the man out by using money, but it never happened like that. Nick called me from a phone he had managed to get a hold of. He said that he had escaped from the man, but it wouldn't be long before the man found him again. I tried hard not lose my head then and there. I asked him if the man had hurt him or touched him! Those questions are things you never want to ask a child so young. It disgust me… he didn't answer, though. He just gave me the name of the place he was near. It was a gift shop close to a national park. I told him I would go get him, but before I could say anything else he said he saw the man's car. I told him to go hide in the forest. Nick was a smart kid and he new how to survive in an environment such as that. I took him camping a lot, so through out the years, we came up with our own signals to indicate where we were in the forest. We would use smoke, rocks, and carve signs into the bark of the trees. The last thing he said was that he promised he would be safe. I looked up the place he mentioned, and found he was so far from home. Before I left to go get him, I left the police and my parents a note. It informed them of the call and the location. I took one of the company's helicopters, and from then managed to find the store. Years of spending time with my brother showed me that he did the most unexpected things. I knew instead of heading straight through the forest he would curve through it. That way the path wasn't so obvious or direct. I was right, of course. I saw the small signs we used, and it took me deep into the forest. Luck wasn't on my side that day, though. It started to rain, and for some reason the rain there was so heavy and loud. It disoriented me and I lost track of any sign I could use to find my brother. I wondered aimlessly for what seemed hours until I heard a shout. It was the man's voice, and my brother pleaded for me to help him. I stumble through the forest, following only the sound of his screams… I was so bloodied and bruised from falling, but I made it to a small clearing. It held a lake. I looked around a found they were not on land. Instead, they were out in the middle of the lake, and my brother was unconscious in a red row boat. The man was with him. When he saw me took out a gun. Thinking back, it probably wouldn't have made its target. I was out of range, but I was so scared. As I thought he was about to shoot I closed my eyes. Instead I heard two shots, and two bodies hit the water. The man had brought a bag of guns and restraints with him, so Nick took another gun shot him in order to defend me. He was somehow shot in the process, though. It took me second to realize this, and when I did I rushed into the waters to save him. My lungs burned and my muscles screamed in agony, but I swam strong and fast. When I got him he wasn't breathing," I stopped here, trying to not let myself fall into hysterics. The memory was after all still fresh in my mind.

I saw Snape and Malfoy both had stony frightened looks on their faces. The story was just that kind, the kind that made you wish you had never heard it to begin with. I began to fiddle with the sheets nervously before continuing with the story.

"I managed to bring him back, though, but he had been shot. The wound was too severe, and there was so much blood…gods it was so much, and it was everywhere. I tried covering it up, but I knew it was too late. He left me with a small mission to find the place where he had been held at. There was something left for me to find there. He knew what was happening… We both knew he was dying and we both in a way said our goodbyes, but before that the man managed to get near the boat. He asked me to help him. At that moment I felt rage and frustration. Did the man not see he had hurt my brother? Did he not know he would die because of him? So why would I try to save him when my brother couldn't be saved? I went to edge and I pushed him down into the water. I held him down with all my might, and despite his struggles, I killed him… I killed another human being, and I did so without magic. I felt so dirty and evil. Even if the man was sick, I still killed him. I hardily had time to ponder, though, my brother needed me…He was cold so I took in my arms, and tried to keep him warm. His last request for me was to sing to him. I use to do this when he was a toddler... I sang him one of my favorite songs… He died in my arms and that was it. I went crazy for a bit, but when I came to my senses, I gave up…I fell asleep next to my dead brother, and that was almost the end. When I woke up it was getting dark, and the only thought in my head was to bring my brother home. I knew he was gone, but I couldn't accept it. I began to talk to him again, as I got back into the water to push to boat back to shore…I had the worst headache in the world, and it wasn't getting better. I carried his body through the woods until sundown. I don't think I've ever been colder or more tired than at that moment when the sun was no more, and I could barely see where I was. By some miracle, there was a search team in the woods already looking for us. One of the officers stumbled upon us and that's how I got out. When they tried to take him from my arms I went mad again. It was almost as if I thought he was sleeping…but I knew better. I was sedated and rushed to the hospital," I finished.

"Hermione, it was never your fault, child," Snape said.

"Who was the man?" Malfoy asked with sorrow in his voice.

"He was an escaped patient from an asylum. It turned out he was also a rapist, but my brother escaped before he could do anything. I remember being so mad at everyone and everything because I couldn't understand why it had happened. Out of everybody in the world, it happened to us. Why? In fact the situation was crazy. It was something that only came out of weird crime series," I replied. The room was quiet. No one said a word, and I was glad. All my life people seemed to talk nonstop, even at my brother's funeral. Everyone had crowded our family and gave us their pity.

"My ravens came to console me. They gave me their full power, but the price was a life long bond. I accepted, and in order to complete the bond I had to offer them all, my blood. They haven't tried to hurt me. Since the moment I've met them they've only been there to help me," I told them, finally revealing the truth of my accident with them.

Both Malfoy and Snape's faces pulled into a scowl. I understood why, though. Dark magic wasn't known to have ever helped. All the history books in the library stated that as a fact, and I too at one point believed that. Now, though? I wasn't to sure. I still felt like myself, and I had no desire to start spewing out any prejudice theories. I was still Hermione, broken and sad, but I was still me. I wasn't sure weather to rejoice at the fact or frown upon it.

"Granger, I'll say this to you once, if you ever do something stupid like this again, I will kick your ass," Malfoy stated bluntly.

"What me godson is trying to say is that you shouldn't put yourself in danger. You would have bled out, and died had Draco not found you. You gave the boy such a fright," Snape pitched in.

"She did not. I was only upset she had marred the landscape with her ugly mess," he retorted. I scoffed. Leave it to Malfoy to turn a moment sour.

"At least you learned that my blood isn't the color of mud. Do hurry and tell Voldemort that. I worry he may go down as the biggest ignorant fool in history," I sneered. Malfoy sneered back at me.

"Now, now children. Lets all try to get along," Snape drawled out sarcastically.

We both gave him a deadpanned look. He ignored us and pulled out a small vile of clear liquid. He carefully opened the lid and sprinkled an unfamiliar herb on it.

"Drink this. Madam Pomfrey made the medicine this morning, and the herbs are for it to work faster," he told me as he handed me the vile.

"What does it do?" I asked.

"It replenishes your blood. I'm surprised you didn't know that," Malfoy mocked.

"I'm not the one who foolishly walked up to a hippogriff without showing any form of respect," I scoffed. He rolled his eyes at me.

"Keeping track of me, Granger?"

"You wish."

"You wound me," he said with fake hurt in his voice.

"If you two are done. Ms. Granger has to take her medicine," Snape cut in. I blushed a bit. I was in my own way enjoying Malfoy's presence.

"Yea, Sure, Uncle. I was leaving anyway. I have to see if a certain Ravenclaw wants to finish a tour of the greenhouse. We were sadly interrupted last time," Malfoy responded. I snorted as I new exactly where he was going, and what he planned to do.

"You're a pig, but please do use protection. I have enough with one young dreadful Malfoy running around the world," I said to him as he was walking away.

"Duly noted, Granger, and by the way my children would be beautiful!" he called over his shoulder.

I chuckled at that.

"Bottoms up, Ms. Granger," Snape said to me, bringing me back to my own situation. I looked back down at the vile in my hand. I knew it would have a foul taste, and that didn't settle too well with me. After years in and out of mental facilities and hospitals, the taste of bitter medicine made me cringe. With one slight sight I emptied the vile into my mouth and swallowed. The moment the clear liquid hit my mouth, I was surprised to taste honey sweet instead of medical bitter.

"It's sweet…" I thought out loud. I looked quizzically up at Snape.

"The herbs also mask the taste," he explained.

"You have no idea have grateful I feel towards you right now," I stated.

"Yes, well you have to be back on the job tomorrow. Get some rest, freshen up, and be back at the classroom after breakfast," he said not letting the situation become too emotional. I nodded and lay back down in bed.

"Before I leave, tomorrow will also be the day the sixth years are sorted into their two new classes. Be prepared for it. Dumbledore and the Order will be keeping a close eye on you," he said. He got up and prepared to leave.

"The Order will be there?" I asked him. Why would they even go to a sorting such as that? Sure the classes were supposed to prepare use for the war the ministry unsuccessfully tried to keep under wraps, but it shouldn't be of concern to the order.

"Yes," he said simply before walking off, leaving me in the dark about the reason.

I furrowed my brow. 'Think Hermione, pretend you're in the corporate world your parents taught you to be ready for,' I said to my self.

At a party or simple event, everyone only goes to win over a major contributor or to keep an eye on the competition. Most of the times, one would just go to observe. If a few of the underdogs looked like they were gaining more profit and popularity, then one would have to gamble or analyze which one would come out on top. The one who has the highest chance would then need to be tempted to sign an agreement of sorts with you. That way when the person did make it to a high social position you would both profit, but one would profit the most since one was the one to, in a way, believe in the person first. Believe meaning, you gave them the gift of staying on top once they made it in the world of success. It was all just a game, and it was a game the Grangers' were well known for.

Putting those standards in the wizarding world, the Order was only there to observe. If they saw potential in an underdog, anyone besides Harry, the Weasleys, or I, then they would become seducers. They would sweet talk their prey into joining them, and gain more tools for their primitive war. I scoffed at their pettiness.

"That wouldn't be fair on the dark side would it," I mockingly said out loud.

I knew better, though. In both worlds, there was always a spy playing double agent. Would he come dressed as himself or in disguise, figuratively speaking? Would that mean a known death eater would be present or would that mean that the Order had a mole? Who did Voldemort send from his side?

**REVIEWS GREATLY APROVED3 **

**A/N; the song that was in this Chapter is called FOR YOU BY ANGUS AND JULIA STONE. It's a great song! Go check it out! Also, I know nothing about business yet so sorry about the last part;D**


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